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"People still think there is something wrong with women who are abused"

4/12/2013

"Living your life fully"

4/10/2013

Self-Blame and Shame

4/9/2013

Many of the participants in our studies blamed themselves or experienced shame at one point as they coped with the domestic violence they faced. Examples of this can be found in the following quotes:

“I lost power and status as I spiraled down an unhealthy path. I did not realize my own worth. As I acted out to cope with these feelings, further damage was done and I blamed myself, rather than the abuse that started me down this path.”
“ I am ashamed that I let him beat who I was to death, and I am ashamed that I took better care of him than I did of me. “
“I still struggle with what and how much to share [with others] and as a result often feel like a hypocrite due to the shame I know I shouldn't feel.”
“I experienced shame because I could not believe that as a strong and independent woman I allowed someone to treat me this way.”
“I still struggle with what and how much to share [with others] and as a result often feel like a hypocrite due to the shame I know I shouldn't feel.”

What do you think it takes for survivors to overcome this shame and self-blame?

"Know that you did not do anything wrong."

4/8/2013

"It was very difficult to admit"

4/5/2013

Feeling disconnected from oneself and others

4/4/2013

Domestic violence victimization can impact people so intensely that they can come to feel like they are no longer the person they once were.

“I felt like I wasn’t even me anymore. I was definitely ashamed of abuse and that it was happening to me.”
“Through the manipulation, my abuser silenced me. I had no power and my needs were irrelevant. This attitude and loss of control stayed with me after we broke up.”
“I started feeling so different from everyone around me that I might as well be a different species, because nobody seemed to understand or empathize with my experience.”

It seemed from many of the survivors’ stories that re-connecting with their own selves was an important part of their process of overcoming their abuse.

"It is more important to see how you respond"

4/3/2013

"It is hard to forgive myself"

4/1/2013

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