I Want to Heal, but How?

By Ashley-Laren Smalls

Did you know that healing and forgiveness go hand in hand? Forgiving an individual is hard, but so is forgiving ourselves. Healing from pain and trauma is hard, but, how can we?
 
There are many different ways that we can start the forgiveness and/or healing process, however, the way I am suggesting for you today is journaling. Through the years, I have found journaling to be very effective for me due to me being able to better process my thoughts and feelings and being able to visualize them. Also, who doesn’t enjoy writing in a judgmental free space?
 
If you are interested in journaling, but have no idea where to start, here are some tips I’ve gathered from my years of journaling that can help you jump start your forgiveness and/or healing journey:
 

1. Pick a specific time of the day that works for you. Now this time of day can vary for each person. Some prefer writing in the morning due to them being well refreshed and having a clear head space. However, I prefer journaling at night time. I prefer to do this because I can write and process my day as well as my feelings for the day. Please keep in mind that there is NO RIGHT TIME to journal and the key is picking a time that works for you and your schedule.
   
2. Find a safe space and quiet spot. The area in which you decide to do your journaling is very important. I have found that writing in a safe space where I am most comfortable, allows me to open up and explore my thoughts more.
   
3. Protect your writing. Because we write very private matters in our journal, it is important to protect our writing. However, if you are in an environment that does not allow you to keep your writings private, please keep that in mind when journaling. If this is you, I would suggest an alternate to journaling such as writing your thoughts on a piece of paper and shredding it afterwards.  
4. Date your writing. Dating all of your journal entries is very useful! Dating has helped me see the progress within myself and my life. Dating your journal entries will help you see if any progress is being made towards your forgiveness and/or healing. Additionally, providing a date helps you keep track of all of your experiences. 
5. Lastly, do not stress. Journaling is supposed to be a liberating activity! If you find yourself feeling stressed or anxious over what to type, try to relax and then try again later. Remember that this is your journal and you can write whatever and however you feel! This is your time to open up and express yourself and move towards forgiveness and healing.

 
Journaling is a great way to move forward in the forgiveness and/or healing journey. As stated by Mina Murray “Journaling is like whispering to one’s self and listening at the same time”. While journaling, we get to learn more about ourselves and our feelings. Most importantly: Our Voice Is Heard.  

Ashley-Laren Smalls is a second-year graduate student at East Carolina University pursuing a Counselor Education degree with a Clinical Mental Health Counseling specialization. Additionally, she graduated from East Carolina University in 2018 with a Bachelor of Arts in Psychology. After volunteering for the National Suicide Lifeline for three years, she has found an interest in destigmatizing domestic violence and destigmatizing mental health in the African-American community. For fun, Ashley-Laren likes to walk her dog, go to the beach, and try new restaurants.