The Power of Telling One's Story: Part One--The Power of the Story

By Christine Murray, See the Triumph Co-Founder

This month’s focus on “Every Survivor Has a Story” has been an especially meaningful one for us at See the Triumph. The stories we heard from the survivors of intimate partner violence who participated in our research are really what drove us to start See the Triumph in the first place, as we knew that these stories were important ones that needed to be told.

As this month draws to a close, I’ll share some additional quotes from survivors in our research that highlight both the power of telling one’s story today, and on Thursday, I’ll address the importance of people finding their own unique ways to do so, either privately or publicly.

One of the main themes we heard from research participants was that telling their story helped play a role in their healing from the effects of the abuse the experienced. For example, one participant said, “Just sharing my story has been cathartic. It has been important for me to tell others that abuse is not just physical; most abuse is actually emotional. Emotional abuse is also something important to recognize.” Another said, “I'm still struggling a lot with my past abuse. But talking about it feels so good. It takes some of that emotional weight & anxiety off my chest.”

We also heard from several participants that talking about their stories helped them to overcome stigma and empower themselves. Consider, for example, the following quotes:

• “I also learned to talk about what happened to me. By not being embarrassed about what happened I claim power of the stigma.”
  
• “I am not afraid to talk about it because it wasn't my fault I didn't deserve what happened to me. No woman does.”
  
• “I decided to stop feeling embarrassed and ashamed and started to speak out about it. I am a lot more open about it, not afraid to admit I was a victim. I still get some people who shut down over it, but I will not hide like an ashamed victim anymore.”
  
• “Talking about my situation empowers me. Learning about the dynamics of abuse including power and control changed my mind and gave me knowledge I did not have before to cope and heal or to advocate for myself and others.”
  
• “I actually tell as many people as I can.........I think that silence protects these animals.”
  
  

In many ways, telling one’s story can be a powerful experience for survivors, and it also sends a strong message to others. As one participant said, “It's not an easy road, it has taken me years to be able to speak to others about my experiences. I have to speak boldly and with confidence in order to help save others and as a clear message to abusers that a human spirit can never be broken beyond repair. I've become a warrior myself in the fight against domestic violence.  The more I reveal the less power the circumstances hold over me.”

Indeed, there is power in telling one’s story. Stories hold the potential for healing, for overcoming, and for educating others. Let’s continue to work together so that survivors’ stories are honored and heard!